The Second Key to Becoming a Magnet of Cooperation and Productivity

“Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand.”

– Karl Menninger

In our previous blog on Keys to attract greater cooperation and productivity, we talked about the importance of listening for comments made by people that open doors into their world.  This blog will go through how to use these comments to go deeper into what they really mean.

Key # Two of Becoming a Magnet of Cooperation and Productivity: The Questions We Ask 

Note: In order for this key to work you must care, be genuine, and your only desire is to understand and not to fix people or prove a point.

We reflect just how genuine we are and how much we care by our questions, body language, and actions. While listening to their responses our minds should be focused on what they are saying, not trying to formulate a response. This takes practice but is totally worth it!

Examples of Questions:

• What do you mean by stressful?

• What is happening?

• It sounds like you have some pretty strong opinions about that. Tell me more

• When you said…….what did you mean by that?

When they tell you, follow-up with another question that goes a little deeper. When we are listening and asking questions other keys will surface. You may choose to ask more about these at the time or come back to it later. The safer they feel to share with you what is going on, the more they will open the door for you to enter into their world.

Some roadblocks that can delay or prevent the opening of the door:

1. When we hear these “keys” we can be caught up in our own problems, interests, or agendas that we don’t care or don’t recognize what they said.  The more we focus on ourselves the less we care about others and the more “surface” or “artificial” become our responses and relationships.  They can sense that very quickly. You do when others are disingenuous with you.

2. When you are listening for the keys and you hear one, the tendency will be to solve their problems, or fix them, just remember that your purpose at this time is to listen to understand where they are coming from and that they feel understood. The time will come later where you can get their permission to share a possible solution if needed.

3. Trust is very important. How you handle the information they share with you will determine exactly how much they feel they can share with you later and how much they will want to work with you.

I recently talked with a woman who has been applying this process with those in her team and with others throughout her company.  She said that the cooperation and productivity is very high within her team, she asks and her team jumps right in, while other managers seem to struggle. She spends time getting to know those she works with.  She listens and is truly interested in who they are and her team knows this.

As a result of the success and her consistent effort she has had several promotions and other benefits have come her way.  She told me the greatest reward though comes from knowing she has made a difference.  A woman who she works with who has been going through some very difficult times in her personal life came to her and told her that she looks forward to coming to work every day because of how she is treated and that someone cares.

Try this for just one day: In your conversations listen for these “key” words, ask questions to learn more, and see how much better you feel about yourself and your relationship with those you work with. Notice how the doors open, cooperation and productivity increases, and how others will recognize you as a listener, a leader, and someone who brings great value into their life and team.